I have two films to see today. An Inconvenient Truth and Shortbus. I’ve never had the luxury to ride the shortbus as I am neither gifted nor special.

Before the first film starts I decide to grab a slice of pizza. I shy a little away from my regular diet when I’m up here for the fest and one of the things that I get to enjoy is Amato’s. If you’ve never had pizza from Amato’s before then you’re missing out. They have so much variety. I’m a non-carbohydrate eating guy for the most part and I figure if I’m going to have some pizza I’m going all out. I basically had a slice of cheese and onion pizza covered in mashed potatoes. It was fantastic. Potatoes on pizza. Go figure.

An Inconvenient Truth. This is a documentary about Al Gore and his slide show about the environment, global warming and the effects of. Some of the facts are rather scary. When you think about how much damage you do just by driving. The U.S. it seems is far behind every other country in the world in dealing with various problems with the environment. Foreign made cars have higher emissions standards than American made cars for example. Excuse me while I take a ride in my new Ford F150. Yikes! Who knew? I enjoyed this documentary because it created a lot of questions and opened the ol’ peepers to the world’s problems. There was some personal stuff about Al Gore’s life which really didn’t need to be in there, but overall it was a good film.

I decide to check out some of the trendier places to see if I can spot any celebrities. I didn’t have much luck as I only walked beside Ashton Kutcher and saw two former Muchmusic people George Snuffleupagus and Rick the Temp. Grand.

Next up is Shortbus directed by John Cameron Mitchell. He directed Hedwig and the Angry Inch. This film is about a bunch of New York City people who deal with the differences between sex and love in and around an underground orgyhouse called Shortbus. Is orgyhouse even a word? It is now. For the most part this film is a porn. Real sexual acts on film. You see it….it’s all there. The only actor I recognized was Sook Yin Lee. She played a sex therapist who cannot achieve an orgasm. She used to be on Muchmusic (is there a theme here) and I saw all of her. I saw all of her doing everything. Apparently, she does so much she was almost fired from her CBC gig. You see various….insertions of various….items. Bodyparts and not bodyparts. A couple of people walked out. There was one scene where about 10 people left. There was a threeway between just dudes and one guy was humming the Star Spangled Banner in the other one’s ass. This is a patriotic film, apparently. My mom will not be getting this update. I’ve heard this film got a standing ovation at Cannes. It was alright, I suppose. Nothing spectacular anyway. The best part of the film was the dude in the audience eating shit as he fell down the stairs in the aisle. Sweet! I was only one who laughed uproariously. Come on!!!! It was funny! [Note from Sean: I assume Greg didn't mean the guy was literally "eating shit", although considering the movie it was, I did have to read that line twice.]

Oh…and on the way home I saw Brad Pitt coming out of his hotel. Paparazzi everywhere! Women screaming! You girls need to get out more.

Anyway….

Sadly…I have to go to a management conference for work for three days. I’ll have a review of Christopher Guest’s For Your Consideration for you when I get back as I’m seeing it right before I head off to the conference.

See you here Wednesday.

I remain

G

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