Hell Comes To Frogtown (DVD)
Directed by: Donald G. Jackson, R.J. Kizer
Written by: Randall Frakes, Donald G. Jackson
Starring: Rowdy Roddy Piper, Sandahl Bergman, Rory Calhoun, William Smith

When the DVD format first arrived, the human race had a chance to erase many cultural blemishes from its history by simply choosing to re-release well-respected films. This would preserve only our finest art for future generations, while leaving all the crap to rot away in obscurity on VHS and/or Beta videocassette. Man… thank god that didn’t happen!

I’ve always said (well, I’m saying it now), that if good movies deserve high quality DVD releases, then so too do the bad movies… maybe even more than the good. I’m guessing the fine folks at Anchor Bay would whole-heartedly agree, and their decision to immortalize the movie Hell Comes To Frogtown on DVD is nothing short of heroic.

This is not to say that Hell Comes To Frogtown is really a bad movie. It just depends on your definition of “bad” I suppose, but I can honestly say it is one of the most outlandish, ridiculous, and hilarious cult sci-fi action films I’ve ever seen. I can’t believe that up until a few days ago, I hadn’t even heard of it… especially considering that the movie stars none other than former WWF superstar Rowdy Roddy Piper! This seems to have been his first feature film role, and probably the performance that convinced John Carpenter to cast him in They Live.

The movie takes place in a post-apocalyptic world in the aftermath of a nuclear war, and as you might expect, most of the human race has been decimated. From the people that remain on the wasteland called Earth, women are now the dominant gender for some reason (maybe they outnumber the men), and infertility is a problem that threatens the survival of future generations of mankind. Enter Rowdy Roddy Piper, aka Sam Hell, one of the few fertile men left on the planet. He is captured by the female-run government and informed that it is his duty to save the world by impregnating as many women as possible. Don’t worry, this isn’t a porno (although there is plenty of T&A) — you see, fertile women are just as rare as fertile men. There is, however, a convenient harem of fertile women that have been enslaved by the evil Commander Toty in Frogtown… but first they must be rescued!

Oh yeah, the other thing I forgot to mention is that when the bombs were dropped, the radiation also created a race of humanoid mutant frogs. I bet the eggheads and bean counters didn’t plan on that! Commander Toty happens to be one of these renegade frogs, and so Sam must set off to Frogtown and free the women before he can courageously “lay some Pipe”, so to speak.

Luckily, he is not alone on his journey to Frogtown. He is accompanied by two government employees, one being Spangle (Sandahl Bergman — Conan The Barbarian), a stuck-up by-the-books Medtech officer in charge of protecting his family jewels. The other is Centinella (Cec Verrell), a bad ass militia woman who looks kind of like Lara Croft. Along the way they also meet up with “Looney Tunes” (Rory Calhoun), a crazy old timer who was a mentor to Sam back in the day.

In some ways Hell Comes To Frogtown seems almost like a spoof of Star Wars and Mad Max. (In fact, according to IMDB there are 2 sequels to this movie, the second of which is entitled “Toad Warrior”.) The movie is also quite original however, and stands on its own as a very uhhh… unique work of sci-fi/fantasy. Believe it or not, the special effects in the movie aren’t half bad either. The frog outfits look pretty cool, complete with the moving eyelids and other creepy animatic movements.

The movie is definitely not intended to be completely serious, and perhaps the most obvious campy element is the ridiculous protective device that Piper has to wear on his crotch. It is labelled “Property of Provisional Government”, and it is used to monitor his sperm count and other stuff. Of course, it also has a “flap”, for easy access during the fertilization process, and strangely enough, a built-in electrocution mechanism that can be controlled by Spangler in order to keep Sam in line. (He is only saving the world against his will after all.) The thing I don’t understand is, why would you want to electrocute the testicles of one of the only fertile men in the world?!

Rowdy Roddy Piper’s acting however, is the stuff that makes for legendary bad movies. He plays it all completely straight-faced, and yet his lack of emotion and grossly overdone machismo should be enough to make anyone crack a smile. There are also some classic lines in this movie, almost as good as Piper’s line from They Live about kicking ass and chewing bubblegum. I don’t want to spoil any of the surprises for you, but the point when I knew this movie was unstoppable was when Spangle is forced to dance suggestively for a mutant frog, and we are shown 3 moving bulges under his loincloth, followed by his announcement, “You have aroused the three snakes!”

There really is no good reason not to own Hell Comes To Frogtown on DVD. I found it at Zellers for like 8 bucks, and for a cheapo DVD, this is unbeatable value.

The video quality is pretty respectable, and it’s presented in 16×9 widescreen with Dolby stereo sound. It also comes with a trailer (hard to believe this was actually in theatres???) and an audio commentary track. Although the audio commentary is not very scene-specific (sounds almost like it could have been culled together from recorded interviews and conversations between the director and writer) it provides some interesting background and it’s more than I expected for a movie like this.

So yeah… as I mentioned, this movie has evil radioactive frogs with three penises, and Rowdy Roddy Piper saving the world with his sperm count! That’s probably all I needed to say right from the start. Track this flick down at all costs, you owe it to yourself to witness The Dance Of The Three Snakes at least once in your lifetime. — Sean

FUBAR (DVD)
Directed by: Michael Dowse
Written by: Michael Dowse, David Lawrence, Paul Spence
Starring: Paul Spence, David Lawrence, Gordon Skilling

It doesn’t seem so long ago that heavy metal and long hair were popular, but in revisiting these things some 20 years later, it makes you wonder how people could have created such a corny, ridiculous culture in the first place. Then you realize that there are still pockets of people around nowadays who are permanently stuck in the world of 80’s hairspray rock. FUBAR is a fake documentary about two such people — the key word there being fake, unfortunately.

A caption near the beginning of the film sums up the premise: “In the summer of 2000, Farrel Mitchner documented the subculture traditionally known as “headbangers”. He chose Terry Cahill and Dean Murdoch as his subjects.” Terry and Dean are just your average long-haired metalheads, working crappy minimum wage jobs, shotgunning beers and causing random destruction for their own amusement. For the most part, FUBAR documents their lives by following them around their neighbourhood, and through interviews with family and friends. The twist in the story is that during the movie, Dean is diagnosed with testicular cancer and both he and Terry have to learn to deal with it in their own way.

Now there’s no denying the fact that FUBAR reuses ideas from other mockumentaries that have come before it, most notably This Is Spinal Tap (although the characters in FUBAR are not actually in a band), Heavy Metal Parking Lot, and also the 1999 film American Movie, a documentary about a long-haired redneck who follows his dream of making movies. Clearly this kind of thing has been done before… and done better.

I think the main problem is just the fact that this movie doesn’t go out of its way to appear real. FUBAR opens with a disclaimer right at the beginning of the movie informing you that it is fake. Maybe they think this helps viewers to be “in on the joke”, but if you ask me, it’s a bad move. From the first few moments of the movie I was aware that the characters in the movie were fictional, and it became painfully obvious to me that David Lawrence and Paul Spence were acting the whole way through. Their speech patterns seemed extremely unnatural to me, almost as if they were imitating Wayne and Garth from Wayne’s World. Their Canadian headbanger accent isn’t consistent. There were moments in the movie where you can tell they are just cracking themselves up. I was constantly being drawn out of the movie, and my inability to take it “seriously” often prevented me from laughing, as strange as that sounds.

Still, I don’t think FUBAR was a bad idea. The idea of mimicking a documentary is a great idea for an entertaining low budget indie film. FUBAR was shot on digital video, and visually it creates a believable look to the movie. The filmmakers also chose a subject worthy of lampooning. I’m sure we’ve all known some spaced out metalheads at some point in our lives, so it’s something everyone can relate to. There was a lot of potential to create a hilarious movie here, but there weren’t enough interesting situations or plot developments to make it memorable. A lot of the movie just feels mundane. In one of the commentary tracks, the filmmakers explain that most of the movie was shot within 5 blocks of their houses in Calgary, and unfortunately it shows.

There is an unwritten assumption here that the idea of heavy metal and long hair is funny enough on its own without having any real jokes or planned humour to carry the film. To some extent that’s true, but only if your dealing with real headbangers! It’s as if the filmmakers came up with an idea to simply record their friends pretending to be metalheads, ad-libbing for hours on end, and then later edit it all together into something that appears to be slightly coherent. Now I could be wrong… maybe there was a script for this project and a lot of planned events, but somehow I doubt it.

The other thing that didn’t really work is their attempt to mix serious topics of cancer and death with characters who are supposed to be oblivious to reality. These were the only real plot elements in the entire film, but it worked against the movie’s comedic qualities. One minute director Mike Dowse wants us to feel for the characters, or appreciate their friendship, and the next he wants us to laugh at how stupid they are. The movie just did not feel genuine at all.

The DVD is full of special features, unfortunately, much like the movie, they don’t really deliver. The deleted scenes in particular are very unfunny and useless.. especially Terry’s fake short film The Package. You’d think with a documentary there would be a ton of leftover footage that would still be worthwhile! There are two separate audio commentary tracks. One contains Dave Lawrence and Paul Spence in character as Terry and Dean (again, borrowing an idea from the Spinal Tap DVD). At times it is funny and shows that they are pretty quick-witted actors, but the characters of Terry and Dean are just too vague and boring to be entertaining throughout the whole movie. On the other hand, the commentary track with Spence, Lawrence and director Mike Dowse is even less interesting. For the most part they point out locations, continuity errors, and soundtrack selections, but don’t give much insight into the making of the movie. There are some music videos included as well from the New Pornographers and Thor. The music in this movie really is top notch, and adds to the energy and authenticity. Getting Canadian bands to cover other Canadian headbanger classics was a great idea, and these videos are a lot of fun.

Overall, I was a bit disappointed with FUBAR. I realize that this review makes me sound like I don’t have a sense of humour, but FUBAR did make me laugh — just not nearly as much as I had hoped. If you aren’t growing tired of the trendy headbanger schtick, you may find this movie to be a laugh riot. I can appreciate this movie as a fun little Canadian indie flick, but in the grand scheme of things, I just think people are working it up to be a lot better than it really is. — Sean

Metroid Prime (Gamecube)
Developed by: Retro Studios
Published by: Nintendo

One of the things that has allowed Sony to overtake Nintendo in the video game market over the years is Nintendo’s unhip reputation for making games that are cute, cuddly and aimed at younger audiences. Although Nintendo has done little to counter this image in the past, they are beginning to realize (perhaps too late) that the gamers who grew up on the original NES are now in their 20’s and 30’s and want something a little more dangerous than Mario and Luigi floating on clouds and collecting stars.

What’s more, Nintendo has never really been one to take risks on creating new characters — they prefer to repeat their easily identified trademark games over and over rather than confuse consumers with unpredictable new products. This may be a safe strategy, but it’s also a dull and stagnant one. Fortunately for them, there is one original franchise that goes against just about everything you would expect from the Big N, and the time was right to revive it and reintroduce it within a 3d world.

Nintendo’s Metroid games have always been darker and more mature than their other creations. Set in a futuristic sci-fi world, deep in the isolation of space, Metroid has more in common with the Alien movies than it does with Princess Toadstool and the Koopa Kingdom. As a big fan of the Metroid series, this game is one of the main reasons I bought a Gamecube, and to call it the most anticipated game of the year would be an understatement for me. And yet, I’ve been preparing myself for disappointment. Maybe I’m a pessimist, but first person shooters rarely work well on consoles, and considering that Nintendo had chosen to outsource the development work to another company, the potential for disaster was pretty high.

Within a few short minutes of gameplay however, it is evident that Texas-based Retro Studios were up to the challenge. They have revitalized the intergalactic bounty hunter Samus Aran in a way that will reassure and delight old fans, while at the same time attracting all kinds of new followers.

Now, this is not to say that the initial minutes of gameplay did not come without a little bit of frustration. First person shooters definitely play better on a PC using a keyboard and mouse, and the controls for Metroid Prime take some getting used to. The main analog stick affects your movement, but by holding down the R shoulder button, gives you the ability to stand still and aim your arm cannon while looking about the world freely. On the other hand, holding down the L shoulder button automatically locks your sights on any enemies in front of you. (Sound like a cop out? It’s not… try aiming directly at opponents while on the run and you’ll quickly see why this feature is necessary.) After getting myself oriented I’ve grown to like the control setup. It’s very flexible; the only complaint I have is that strafing is a little difficult (though not impossible) to do.

Now the other big question I had about the controls in this game is how they were planning on implementing the “Maru Mari”, also known as the Morph Ball, which allows Samus’ suit to transform into a sphere that can roll into hard to reach areas. I thought they might be forced leave this out of the game, as it’s not a typical FPS style of movement. However, the way they solved the problem is brilliant. When you hit the X button, the camera view shifts back into a 3rd person POV as you roll into a ball. From here you are free to roam around with speed that is sensitive to the force you apply to the analog stick. It’s very intuitive and the realistic physics in many ways reminds me of the game Marble Madness.

Even the act of jumping is a fairly painless process in Metroid Prime, which is rare for a first person game. I think it is because Samus seems to float through the air a little… maybe the gravity is lower on the planet Tallon IV, or maybe it’s just an ability of her suit, but it makes all the difference in the world.

In Metroid Prime, Samus’ suit also has some new gadgets, including thermal and x-ray vision, plus a built-in scanning system which allows your computer to download information about creatures, environments, and gadgets. You cannot scan a creature and attack it at the same time however, which is occasionally frustrating.

The graphics in Metroid Prime are stunning. The number of different environments that are covered even just in early levels of the game are overwhelming. There are so many cool details, like for instance, the little drops of water that trickle down your visor when you rise out of water. One problem, however, is that sometimes there is too much detail in each scene, and it’s hard to distinguish between what’s important and what’s not. The scanning system exists to help you in this area, but scanning every single item in a room can become tedious after a while.

The best part about Metroid Prime, however, is the atmosphere that results from the combination of graphics and the sound. In the past, Metroid games have always felt somewhat spooky and suspenseful, with a hint of extraterrestrial intrigue. The music has always been a big part of this, and for Metroid Prime they recruited composer Kenji Yamamoto, who previously wrote the score for Super Metroid. The soundtrack is an awesome mix of ambient noise and spacey electronic melodies. It’s good enough music to listen to on its own; in fact, if they released a soundtrack for this game on CD, I’d be the first in line to buy it.

There are occasionally small cut scenes or cinematics, but there is no dialogue in this game, which is odd for a FPS but standard for a Metroid game. Samus works alone, and interacts with no one other than the hostile creatures in her way. In some ways this heightens the suspense and adds to the feeling of isolation. The first person perspective brings that out more than with any other Metroid games in the past.

In preserving the atmosphere of the game, Retro Studios also employed some cool tricks to avoid any sudden interruptions for loading time. As you explore in Metroid, the levels load in the background as you play, so there never are any stops in the game.

As a side note, Nintendo has also simultaneously released a Metroid game for the Game Boy Advance called Metroid Fusion, and they wouldn’t dare miss out on an opportunity to market these games together. Nintendo has again decided to regurgitate their past by offering a playable version of the original Metroid game if you beat Metroid Fusion and link up with Metroid Prime using their special connector cable. You can also play through Metroid Prime wearing the special “fusion suit” from the GBA game after linking the games together. Although this adds a bit more replay value to the game, I don’t consider this to be a good reason for buying the games.

Thankfully, Metroid Prime stands alone as a game that is fresh and exciting yet also in tune with its predecessors. On its own, this is a solid game that deserves a spot alongside some of the great sci-fi first person shooters like Half-Life and Halo. However, it’s much more than a first person shooter. Add in the classic Metroid atmosphere, sense of exploration and intuitive game mechanics, and you’ve got a game that’s quickly become one of my personal all-time favourites, and definitely ranks among the best of 2002. — Sean

Adaptation
Directed by: Spike Jonze
Written by: Charlie and Donald Kaufman
Starring: Nicholas Cage, Meryl Streep, Chris Cooper

In writing a review of Adaptation, I just may be attempting the impossible. This movie is both a challenge to watch, and a challenge to write about. But my goal here is not to pass any sort of judgement on this mindbending masterpiece; there is simply no benchmark for comparison, no critical viewpoint that can hope to do it justice. As far as movies go, Adaptation is in a league of its own. I aim only to try and give a brief synopsis, an idea of why this movie is so unique and what you can expect to get from it.

Let me start by asking this: how many movies have you seen recently where you actually knew the name of the screenwriter? Probably not too many, unless you count movies that were written and directed by the same person. In the film industry, the directors and actors are the big names that sell tickets, while the screenwriters get little to no credit for their hard work behind the scenes. Kind of silly when you realize that filmmaking is more or less the art of telling a story visually — without the writer there would be no story for the director to tell, and no clever dialogue to make the actors look cool. This is where Adaptation breaks down the traditional Hollywood barriers. With this movie, you have no choice but to take note of the screenwriter because, well, he wrote himself in as the movie’s main character.

That’s not the weird part though, after all, autobiographical stories are being written all the time. The weird thing is that Charlie Kaufman was originally hired to write an adaptation of a non-fiction book called “The Orchid Thief” by Susan Orlean. The Orchid Thief is based on real life interviews and experiences that Susan had with a John Laroche, a botanical expert and obsessive flower collector in south Florida. However, Kaufman found himself at a loss to adapt the book for the screen, and so he turned to one of those silly tricks for relieving writer’s block… he began to write a screenplay about his own struggle to write the screenplay for The Orchid Thief. Sound confusing? It is, kind of. But as weird and unworkable as it seems, Kaufman actually manages to mold that concept into a comical yet beautiful portrait of life.

Not just anyone could pull off such a thing, but Charlie Kaufman also happens to be the man behind the bizarre, critically-acclaimed comedy Being John Malkovich. Knowing this, you may begin to understand how his mind could generate some of the ideas contained within Adaptation. You may also begin to understand why Columbia Pictures would be willing to pay good money to turn a script like this into a feature film.

Being John Malkovich, like Adaptation, is directed by Spike Jonze, and it is definitely the only movie that can really be compared to it. Adaptation is not quite as hilarious, but it is a much more ambitious film. And as strange as Malkovich is, Adaptation is way off the deep end. Some of the scenes in Adaptation actually take place on the set of Being John Malkovich (which may confuse people unfamiliar with Kaufman’s previous writing credit). The weird thing is, in these scenes you have Nicholas Cage playing Charlie Kaufman, who interacts with some of the real actors from that movie such as John Cusack and Catherine Keener, who play themselves. Then in other scenes there are Meryl Streep and Chris Cooper, playing the real-life versions of Susan Orlean and John Laroche as they exist in Orlean’s book. Oh, and did I mention Charlie Kaufman’s twin brother Donald, also a budding screenwriter, and also played by Nicholas Cage?

One of the cool things about Adaptation is how it successfully blurs fiction and real-life, which creates a lot of mystery and a lot of depth. A viewing of Adaptation conjures up a ton of questions, including: How much of this movie is based on the book? How much of the material is autobiographical of Charlie Kaufman? Does Kaufman really have a twin brother? What the heck does Susan Orlean think of this movie?

Nicholas Cage puts in one of his best performances ever with this movie. He doesn’t do comedies very often, but he really seems much better suited for these kinds of roles than for the big dumb action hero parts. He’s the kind of guy I just can’t take seriously, and in the exagerrated world of Adaptation, that is the perfect quality to have. Chris Cooper, who is probably best known for his role in American Beauty, plays Laroche as a cartoony southern redneck type who can make you laugh, and yet also make you admire him as well. Meryl Streep plays Susan Orlean as a soft-spoken and thoughtful New Yorker journalist in awe of Laroche’s determination.

A good portion of the movie focuses on Kaufman’s struggle to write the movie script, while also dealing with his low self-esteem and lack of social skills. He hasn’t met Susan Orlean before, but he starts to become infatuated with her as he reads her book. He tries to meet with her to help with the screenwriting process, but he is too nervous and he chickens out. While this is going on, his twin brother is trying to write a movie script of his own, which is nothing more than laughably cliched Hollywood tripe. Interspersed throughout this are re-enactments of scenes directly from The Orchid Thief. By the end of the movie, both worlds collide and lead to a pretty outrageous climax.

Adaptation explores a lot of what goes into writing a movie; this aspect may bore some people, but it is what allows the movie to have such a clever sense of humour. In dissecting the process of writing, Kaufman manages to poke fun at himself, as well as Hollywood filmmaking conventions, but he also brings out some interesting ideas and truths about life in general. The recursive layers of symbolism and self-reflective irony are so thick that you probably can’t hope to absorb all of it in one viewing. In fact, there are probably many double meanings hidden in this movie that Kaufman himself didn’t even intend.

After having explained all of this, you can clearly see that this is one hell of an original movie. It’s also not one that will be easily digested by the average moviegoer. It’s one of those movies where you only get out of it what you put into it, and to give it a simple “thumbs up” or “thumbs down” is somewhat meaningless. I think I saw the most walkouts ever during this film, which is kind of frustrating, and yet at the same time, reassuring. The best movies are ones that push the limits of what a movie is, and Adaptation accomplishes this utterly and completely. To the best of my knowledge, there is nothing out there quite like Adaptation, and that is one good reason why you should see it. The other reason is that it’s one of the funniest movies I’ve seen in a long time. — Sean

Human Nature (DVD)
Directed by: Michel Gondry
Written by: Charlie Kaufman
Starring: Patricia Arquette, Rhys Ifans, Tim Robbins

Pretty much everyone missed Human Nature when it finally got released this year. It debuted at Cannes in 2001 and was put on hold for a long long time. Bad sign. It received pretty lousy reviews upon its release, and I couldnt understand why. I still don’t. Charlie Kaufman is God.

Let me first point out that Human Nature isn’t a work of genius. It doesnt work on as many levels as the new Adaptation does, and it doesn’t raise any questions like Being John Malkovich did. It is however, very quirky, funny and weird, with an appropriate cast and a capable director in Michael Gondry. Funny how yet another music video director nabbed a Kaufman flick. You’ve probably seen his weird and inventive videos for Bjork, Chemical Brothers, Daft Punk and others.

The story: Lila (Patricia Arquette) has a condition where she hastoo much body hair that she cant get rid of, to thepoint where she looks like an ape. She escapes to thewilderness to commune and become a nature writer.

Nathan (Tim Robbins) is a scientist with an extremely small penis. He was raised very strictly by his parents (Robert Forster and Mary Kay Place! Yay!) to have good etiquette and speak with large words. He now is trying to teach table manners to mice. He hooks up with Lila and they find Puff.

Puff (Rhys Ifans, Adrian in “Little Nicky”) is absolutely awesome and steals the show. He was raised in the wilderness by his father, played by Toby Huss a.k.a. King of the Hills’ Cotton Hill and Kahn Souphanousinphone. Nathan kidnaps him and teaches him table manners.

You don’t need to know much more than that, but here’s more anyways. Theres more partner swapping here than in Being John Malkovich, theres a musical number, theres Mirando Otto (Eowyn from the Two Towers) as Nathan’s assistant Gabrielle, theres a lot of dry humping gags and hilarious dialogue. Rosie Perez even managed to find work in this movie playing a electolosis doctor who finds love with a midget in the end.

As for extra features. Well, there is none. Because we the people didnt even try to find time for this movie, we got nuttin. Apparently a European release for this film includes music videos from the directors’ band, but alas, we are without nary a scratch of special features for Human Nature. Which is sad because it could have been a selling point for people to search out this hilarious and weird little comic gem. A definite renter, and if you like, spend the extra dough for the DVD. — Goon

Phantom Planet - The Guest
(Sony)

Movie stars wanna rock. Nothing new, and not reallymentioning, considering how many embarrassmentscelebrities have brought upon them entering the musicindustry.

So why should Phantom Planet get any recognition? Itcould be because Phantom Planet is the pet project ofour beloved Max Fischer. Thats right, Mr. JasonSchwartzman of “Rushmore” fame. Singer Alex Greenwaldhas had his share of fame too, playing bully SethDevlin in “Donnie Darko”.

For the most part, Phantom Planet’s “The Guest” works. After a previous album “Phantom Planet is Missing”that also received decent reviews, the band seems tohave honed their craft a bit more and have puttogether an album that closely resembles earlyRadiohead mixed with 70s style Partridge Family popmusic. Specifically, Alex Greenwald’s voice resemblesthat of upper-level Radiohead ripoff band Muse. Bitsand pieces of Sloan and Jimmy Eat World style are alsonoticable.

“California” opens with piano and a nice melody andhook that immediately gets your attention and has astrong guitar/drums build as Greenwald bellows “Herewe come”.. The song seems to be one of those “just gothome from touring” tracks, and is tailor made for the”Orange County” soundtrack of which it was a part of.

Most of the songs follow this type of lead, a slow tomid-tempo ballad such as “Lonely Day” and “In OurDarkest Hour” has pretty much the same arrangement asa slightly faster song such as “Hey Now Girl”, whichjust begs for Archies comparisons. There have been alot of people comparing Phantom Planet to Weezer andPavement, and the packaging sticker even uses this asa selling point, however the songs really don’t carrythe edge that either of those bands have, beating youover the head with how cute and fun they are withoutany sort of depth or emotion other than “happy to bealive”. A song such as “Anthem”, with lyrics such as”what the world needs is an anthem and I hoping thatthe world will sing along” , could really drive peoplenuts.

But thats all well and good for me, sometimes you needa dumb happy power pop record, and this one does thetrick. If you can stand incredibly cutesy andsometimes cheesy pop, Phantom Planet just might be foryou. A lot of potential in this group - they couldreally explode into a huge radio band. — Goon

Bruce McCulloch - Drunk Baby Project
(Tront Communication)

I remember the first time I heard a Bruce McCulloch song. He was still in Kids in the Hall at the time, yet the first time I heard “Daves I Know” came from the Northern Pikes of “She aint pretty” fame, as they covered the song in the fields of Club Roma on tour with the Watchmen. I was 12 or so and I watched it from my roof.

I knew then that I heard something special. Bruce McCulloch, as mentioned, is the Kids in the Hall alumni who has spent his years since the breakup doing shorts for Saturday Night Live and directing the films “Dog Park”, “Stealing Harvard” and “Superstar”. Those projects had mixed results. His music side projects on the other hand, are much more noteworthy.

Bruce had another album in 1996 called “Shame Based Man” on Atlantic Records which is another favorite of mine, and includes the “Daves I know” track along with several other great tunes. “Drunk Baby Project” will be well received by KITH diehards like myself who really miss their dark, clever and absurd humor.

To sum up Bruce’s music for a modern audience, picture Tenacious D meets the Doors. Or those beat-poetry-set-to-music pieces that Mike Myers did for “So I Married An Axe Murderer”. And of course, recall “Daves I Know” which was a moderate hit, and recall the songs Bruce fronted as Greevo, lead singer of Death Lurks, for the “Brain Candy” soundtrack. Yeah, its like that. The music itself ranges from good to very good, and can stand on its own in only a way that the D have been able to do thus far. Surely this is no Sam Kinison rock record, and thank Jebus for that.

Bruce sings of being treated as a science project in the albums title track, to “keep those tipsy toddlers alive.” and furthermore: “Drunk babies shouldnt drive!” Bruce can write monologues with the best of them, and his delivery is what truly makes it funny. On the album, Bruce can sympathize with what young Bob Seger must have went through, what its really like to participate in “the making of love” with some serious vigor, how to read the Bible, and what the laugh track on bad comedy shows really means, for all of us.

“The Bible” and “Lil’ Gay Waiter” are faster songs, both twangy and yet full of rock, but the best tracks for me are the slower ones driven by a story. McCulloch’s lines about the battle for supremacy between the Clinique ladies and the Body Shop girls get funnier with each listen, with the climax of hilarity rearing its head sometime around when Foot Locker Ron steps into the fray.

The only song that doesnt really work for me is “Cheer For The Team”. The song has a really good crunchy riff that actually outdoes McCulloch’s point. And as much as I always liked Bruces KITH performance of “The Hangover Chronicles”, it wasnt really all that necessary to include it. Perhaps there was just a fan demand for this to hit record, or perhaps Bruce was using up old material to fill space. I don’t know. Its good, but… whatever.

“Drunk Baby Project” really is one of the best releases I’ve heard in a while, and one that I’m sure I’ll listen to over and over, just like “Shame-Based Man”. Just as Bruce says on “For the Ladies” - Stick it inside! — Goon

Foo Fighters - One By One
(RCA)

So sue me, I like the Foos. Dave Grohl is one of the few genuine, honest guys in the music industry, and he’s also a great songwriter in spite of that (or maybe because of that). Sure his songs are poppy, radio-friendly and accessible as hell, but many of them also rock harder than anything else being played on commercial radio nowadays. Just look at some of the past Foo Fighters singles: Everlong, Monkeywrench, Breakdown, I’ll Stick Around… I don’t care if 14 year old girls hum these tunes on their way to the Muchmusic dance party, they’re simply great songs.

That said, their last album, There Is Nothing Left To Lose, didn’t rock quite so hard and was a bit of a disappointment. Grohl himself admitted that “Learn To Fly” was one of the most commercial songs he had ever written in his life, and he proclaimed an eagerness to get back to his punk rock roots on his next trip to the recording studio.

The band line-up for One By One was certainly perfectly suited for such a return to form; Taylor Hawkins is one of the only powerhouse drummers who can even come close to filling Grohl’s own shoes behind the kit, and the addition of Chris Shiflett (ex-No Use For A Name) on guitar has provided even more sonic depth along with more complimentary hints of heavy metal riffage. Then there’s the other founding member Nate Mendell still calmly laying the solid groundwork on bass, and Grohl himself who had his rock appetite whetted by playing with Queens Of The Stone Age earlier in the year.

The album starts off strong with the new single “All My Life”, a mean, chugging lead-off locomotive, and “Low” and “Have It All”, both of which find Shiflett showing off some cool guitar harmonic tricks with Grohl’s vocal melodies woven in between. Even the song “Disenchanted Lullaby”, which begins somewhat mellow and dreary, digs in and offers up a headbanging chorus in fine Foo fashion.

After this however, the record downshifts gears and moves into no man’s land. The next few songs prove to be little more than “Foo Filler”, each with a general lack in direction and intensity. The song “Tired Of You” is a turning point for the album, as it drags along for 5 minutes without ever really progressing or evolving into something worth remembering.

Many of the songs that follow have the odd catchy riff or vocal melody, but not enough to make them stand out one way or another. Individually these tracks are not bad, but combine them all with a glossy production job and it quickly becomes an album where the last half blurs together insignificantly. It also doesn’t help when every single song is longer than 4 minutes, which prolongs the dull moments, and kills the cool parts by repeating them in excess. Case in point, the 7-minute finale “Come Back” which is actually one of the best songs on the album, but it simply carries on too long.

Dave Grohl claims to be more proud of this album lyrically than any other he has written. I find this strange, particularly when you take into account the fact that the lyrics are not printed in the liner notes, and also one of the quotes inside that reads, “I do wrong to put my heart into what I write, that is no longer done.” I can only hope that is sarcastic, but the album and song titles have gotten very bland and neutral as of late, which would seem to indicate that Grohl has taken to writing to writing songs in a vague and generalized way.

Some versions of the cd come with a bonus DVD that includes videos for All My Life and Walking A Line, an abrasive bonus song that really should have been on the album. The cd also has a link to a website where you can access some cover songs recorded by the Foo Fighters. Unfortunately I couldn’t get these to work. It would have been nice if you could just download MP3s instead of using some Windows Media streaming technology.

One By One is definitely a hit and miss record, but I think that Foo Fighters fans will find it much more enjoyable than There Is Nothing Left To Lose. It’s a step back in the right direction, although it’s not as raw and aggressive as some may have you believe. As long as you’re not afraid to listen to something overtly radio-friendly, then by all means, give it a spin. — Sean