Centaur - In Streams
(Martians Go Home/Parasol)

Centaur was started by Matt Talbot, the former lead singer of the band HUM. Even though they have countless bootleg recordings floating around, fans are finally treated to a finished studio recording. When I first got my copy of In Streams, I was excited almost to the point of climaxing in my pants. For me this was the closest thing to hearing new Hum material and I was hoping it would fill the void that Hum occupied. So it makes sense for me to hold valid comparisons to Hum. Centaur even used the same producer that was involved with You’d Prefer an Astronaut, the album that elevated Hum’s rocket ship to success.

The majority of the songs are slow and spacey with a dulled down pinch of Hum. Apparently there was a death in Talbot’s family. I’m not sure who it was, but judging by what I’ve read, it was a miscarriage. It makes sense that the mood of the songs are what they are. However many of them don’t stand out. In a nutshell, it’s not at the level I’d hope it would be. Some of the riffs are weak and cheesy and the songs are a bit on the snoozy side. For the most part, In Streams is one of those albums that you start listening to and totally forget about in the short and long run. There are a couple of good tunes that I tend to pop on here and there, but I wouldn’t go out of my way to get the cd out. (Yes I’m that lazy, so shut up!)

I’ve listened to this album forcefully quite a few times, in hopes that I would enjoy it on more levels. But my feeling just remains untouched. It hurts me deeply saying these things, kind of like having your balls placed under a vice grip as someone slowly tightens the handle. It’s not the best album, but I wouldn’t say it was the worst either. I give this a 6.6 out of 10 on my ass kick meter even though in this case only about half an ass cheek made contact with the foot. — Chian

Spongebob Squarepants DVDs

Spongebob Squarepants is a kiddie series of sorts thats been around a couple years now, but I only really took notice of it recently. You’ve probably seen his face around enough places by now, donning a whole string of great licenced merchandise that rivals the Simpsons, and is on pretty much every night on YTV, Nickelodeon in the US. Created by Stephen Hillenberg (Rocko’s Modern Life), you could say Spongebob is in many ways the new (but a tamer) Ren and Stimpy. Its childish, funny/stupid/clever (such a fine line), at times dark, insane and doesn’t make sense. The characters drink water, spray water, go to the beach and surf, etc…

Spongebob is the main character, a naive young sponge who would seem is between 18-24 yet acts like he’s 6. Spongebob lives on his own away from his parents, has a pet snail named Gary, and works a job as a cook at the Krusty Krab. He has a neighbor named Squidward who is his opposite, an egotistical yet depressed squid. Spongebob’s best friends are Patrick Star, an astoundingly dumb starfish who lives under a rock and goes jellyfishing (kind of like butterfly collecting), and Sandy Cheeks, a Texan squirrel who lives in an underwater dome.

There are two things I find especially notable about the Spongebob show. First thing is, despite being a great kids show, it has that Muppet Show type feel that brings in the adults. Bands like the Violent Femmes, Pantera and others contribute tunes, Spongebob has a regular job and goes to driving school and has pretty adult situations going on. Several peripheral characters are stonerish, devious, stupid (like the way real people are stupid) and greedy.

The second thing is the extraordinary voice talent in the show. Spongebob himself is voiced by Tom Kenny, best known before as one of the regular cast members of Mr. Show (the tall skinny guy), as well as too many other cartoon/video game charcters to mention, including Spyro the Dragon, Asok and Ratbert on Dilbert, and Wally, one of the gay couple on Mission Hill. Patrick is Bill Fagerbakke (Tom Cullen in “the Stand” and Dauber on “Coach”). Spongebob’s boss, Mr. Krabs, is voiced by Clancy Brown, Dr. Neo Cortex himself as well as Kurgan from Highlander. The show is full of a lot of great lines, and it helps to have this sort of talent behind it.

Now, on to the DVD releases. There have been three thus far by Nickelodeon, each having ten 10-12 minute episodes, with just a few special features added on. The video releases of these only have 5. Some would suggest that 5 on each release must simply be filler then… there might be an argument to that, as the first release, Nautical Nonsense and Sponge Buddies, is put together from the episodes of two seperate video releases of the same names. This set is probably the best overall and the best for anyone not completely familiar with the Absorbant One to get acquainted with. Spongebob’s probably strongest episode overall ever is on this disc, “Graveyard Shift”, in which the Squidward and Spongebob work the night shift together, only to seemingly be haunted by a ghost that Squidward made up to scare Spongebob. In “Wormy”, a caterpillar that Spongebob and Patrick are babysitting for Sandy, turns into a butterfly and their town of Bikini Bottom burns to the ground in fear. In “Ripped Pants”, Spongebob turns to physical comedy, which garners him great attention from his friends until he goes too far.

This disc has the most and best special features of the three discs as well. There is a good backstage featurette on the creation of an episode, including long takes with the voice talent doing the entire “graveyard Shift” episode… You’ll marvel watching how Tom Kenny manages to do the Spongebob laugh.

On the second release “Halloween”, you don’t get much for menus or special features, but the episodes are considerably weirder, with some of the greatest Spongebob moments. Spongebob goes cock rock in “Band Geeks”, loses his brain in “Welcome to the Chum Bucket”, and gets attacked by his drawings in “Frankendoodle”… only around half the episodes are actually Halloween related, but I don’t really care.

The third and most recent Spongebob release is “Sea Stories”, and despite having the best cover and the best menu, it has to rank third overall in quality. The episodes simply aren’t as funny or weird as the other two releases. It has its moments though, such as Spongebob fighting with Gary to take a bath, Patrick making use of peer pressure in “Hooky”, swearing up a storm in “Sailor Mouth”, hanging out in Weenie Hut Jr.s, and going rave in “Jellyfish Jam”. In its favor, this disc gives three alternate endings to the episode “Shanghaied” and the “Dancin Pants” video is fun.. I wouldn’t know if the video games hints and tips section is helpful or not, but worth watching once to see how Spongebob adapts into a 3-d game.

Given their reasonable price and replay value, these would be great for any cartoon freak to pick up. Thumbs way up for the first two releases and thumbs moderately up (just not as far up) for Sea Stories. — The Goon

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
Directed by: Chris Columbus
Written by: J.K. Rowling (novel), Steven Kloves (screenplay)
Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint, Richard Harris, Robbie Coltrane, Alan Rickman, Maggie Smith, Warwick Davis

Well, the second installment in the Harry Potter saga has finally materialized on the big screen, and even though it was a little less hyped than the first, it has proven to be even more enjoyable. I keep telling myself I’m going to read the books, but I still haven’t gotten around to it, so of course all the events in the movie were brand new to me. If anything, this added to my experience of the movie, because at the very heart of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets is a mystery, and it was one that kept me enthralled right until the very end.

It all starts when a “house elf” shows up and tries to convince Harry Potter that he should not go back to Hogwart’s because he will be in grave danger. It turns out that there are rumours of a secret chamber that is hidden on the grounds of the school that, when opened, will unleash a monster. Salazar Slytherin was one of the founders of the school, and he was eventually ousted because he wanted Hogwart’s to be exclusive to pure blood wizards, and according to the legend he created this chamber that will one day be reopened by his heir and let loose a monster that will hunt down all the non-purebloods in the school. Events lead them to believe that the chamber has been opened, and this prompts Harry, Ron and Hermione to investigate. Much is revealed from the school’s history, and many people are found to be hiding secrets, but their investigation builds up to a terrifying confrontation.

Now it seems to me that much of the story was written “on the fly”, so to speak. What I mean by this is that the characters seem to encounter one problem after another… you can bank on the fact that anything that can go wrong will indeed go wrong. But even books like the Lord Of The Rings suffered from this to a certain extent. It seems to be a natural drawback to writing a fantasy story, because you can always invent new magical solutions to problems whenever you want. There’s a little more at work under the surface though. There are traces of character development, little hints at things that are to come in the following installments. This is why it’s cool to make a series of movies that were originally conceived as a series. Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets is not a mindless sequel; you can actually feel a progression starting to take place.

Part of the “magic” of the Harry Potter series is the variety of characters and their unique personalities. We get introduced to a few new characters in this book, including the amusingly self-centred Professor Gilderoy Lockhart played by Kenneth Branagh, and Draco Malfoy’s father, Lucius (Jason Isaacs), who is about as unlikeable as possible. We also meet Ron Weasley’s sister Ginny (Bonnie Wright), who I am going to guess eventually becomes Harry’s love interest. On a sad note, Richard Harris recently passed away, which means they will have to find a new person to play Professor Dumbledore for the next movie. This is unfortunate because Harris was perfect in the role of the sympathetic old wizard who is wiser than he lets on.

The special effects were top notch once again. Through computer graphics they have managed to create some of the coolest and most realistic-looking monsters I’ve ever seen, which I suppose is par for the course when ILM is involved, but the interaction between the animated characters and real actors in this movie feels much more natural than in either of the last 2 Star Wars movies.

One thing that people keep asking me is whether or not Harry Potter is a kid’s movie.Well the simple answer is yes, without a doubt. After all, the main characters are kids, and what kid wouldn’t want to be in their shoes? The world of Harry Potter is an exciting and adventurous one indeed. But there’s a classic fantasy feel to the characters and events in these stories, one that bares many similarities to The Lord Of The Rings for example. Wouldn’t J.R.R. Tolkien have said that The Hobbit was a children’s story too? And isn’t Star Wars just a simple fairytale? The Harry Potter movies can easily be enjoyed by people of any age, and as it turns out Harry Potter And The Chamber of Secrets is actually darker than the previous Harry Potter film. The monsters are more menacing, the story is more suspenseful, and the climax of the movie is actually somewhat violent and bloody.

The only real complaint I have about this film is that the actors’ voices drove me nuts. Daniel Radcliffe and Rupert Grint are apparently just hitting puberty, and any time they have to act scared or yell something, their voices screech like fingernails on a chalkboard. I guess there’s not much that can be done about this… it will be interesting to see just how much more grown up they are by the time next year’s Harry Potter film hits.

Oh, one other thing deserves mentioning. This is a long movie. Over 2 and a half hours I believe, just like the last one. That is a long time to ask kids to sit still for, but something tells me kids will not lose interest along the way. It’s not that it was unbearable, but some of the scenes could have used a little trimming I think.

The problem is that novels are not meant to be read in one sitting, so there is no limit to how long a book can be. Movies on the other hand, do have certain time conventions that they need to adhere to. It’s hard making an adaptation of a book like this because you want to be true to the material, but you certainly can’t go much beyond 150 minutes. Perhaps in North America we should consider having intermissions in the middle of movies… this type of thing is already done some places in Europe, and although I understand the need to keep people immersed in the film, movies like Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets do push the limits of how long we can remain seated for. (What will they do with the fourth Harry Potter book? That one is like twice the size of the other ones if I’m not mistaken.)

Either way, this was a great movie, and should be enjoyable to just about anyone with a little bit of imagination. Don’t miss out just because you think you’re too old for it. — Sean

Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 4 (PS2)
Developed by: Neversoft
Published by: Activision

This installment in the Tony Hawk’s pro skater series is by far the best one yet. If you thought THPS 3 kicked ass, THPS 4 not only kicks it but makes you its bitch at the same time.

The biggest improvements would have to be the newly revised career mode. For those of you who are already familiar with any other THPS, the career mode in this version is kind of like free sk8 mixed in. You have no time limit and the option to choose when you want to do a goal. You can also save a restart point, which comes in handy when you’re trying to conquer that triple axle turd man fart roof gap (no such gap is depicted in the game. I just made it up so I could use the word fart in a sentence) and don’t want to waste time getting there again if you mess up. Also in this version you are granted the ability to do spine transfers and flatland tricks. I won’t bother getting into details, but trust me, these features come in handy and also have the ability to kick ass. Boy, you should be really sore by now.

Although THPS4 is a kick ass game, there are many things that could be improved on like graphics and sound. The player models look a bit better overall but it generally looks just like THPS3. But hey, who cares? It’s all about that addictive trademark gameplay that will keep you away from many of life’s necessities. I just feel sorry for all the Newbies that are being exposed to THPS for the first time, because it’s a damn challenging game. Although you don’t have to beat the game with every character, there are over a 150 goals to beat, not to mention the gaps, secret skaters, pro challenges, levels, boards, clothing, cheats, tricks, etc. My only beef would be some of the tunes in the game. I enjoy the Iron Maiden skid rock, but a couple of those generic cheesy punk tunes have got to go. I enjoy punk but in this case it’s “skunk”.

It’s the little things that make this game addictive like fine Columbian smack straight from Sanchez himself. It’s amazing how Neversoft successfully adds that extra creamy coat of whip cream every time a new version is due out. Be warned though, once that power button is turned on, it’s not coming off until you realize you’ve lost all your friends. Don’t worry my son, THPS 4 is better than friends. All you need is Tony. I’m not talking in that gay way either. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I give this a 9.5 of soreness out of 10 on my ass kick meter. — CHIAN

Beck - Sea Change
(DGC)

Although I’m not the biggest Beck fan around, I have enjoyed some of his past albums; mainly Midnite Vultures. When I heard about the new Beck album, I was hoping for something fun and danceable. Instead I got to hear Beck being depressed because he broke up with his girlfriend. I guess you could compare this album to Mutations and One Foot in the Grave (which I haven’t heard), but this one leaves a bad taste in my ears (which oddly enough are capable of tasting). It’s not so much that the music is bad, because it isn’t, but just the fact that it’s a step down from Midnight Vultures.

The album itself is full of slow, soothing ballads, backed by a single set up of drums, some slide guitar, and acoustic guitars. Every now and again you’ll get an orchestra or some electronic sounds, but the album is pretty much the same throughout. At times Beck can get a little too “singy”, something that I felt ruined a lot of his songs live as well. He’s trying too hard and doing too many vocal solos, making him sound more and more like a modern R&B singer. What happened to the vocoders? Or the Prince-esque vocalistic stylings? I guess they left with his long-time girlfriend.

I happened to catch Beck’s tour for this album, where he was playing with the Flaming Lips both as an opening act and his back-up band. The Flaming Lips were fun and exciting and had a great energy level, then Beck came out and pissed on the party. When I was wanting more Flaming Lips, Beck was whining about his tour bus and how tired he was. Maybe I’m being a little biased based on that single performance.

Basically this album is still alright, but it’s just not the same Beck I’m used to. And maybe the Beck I’m used to isn’t the Beck that the “true fans” want, but I could care less. I want to hear more about Deborah working at the JC Penny, not about how lonely he is. — Jay

NHL 2003 (PC)
Developed and Published by: Electronic Arts

Before I offer my opinion of NHL 2003, let me start by saying this: put yourself in EA’s shoes for a moment. They have to develop a new hockey game every single year. Okay, so nobody’s putting a gun to their head. But when it’s consistently bringing in cash every year, it would be silly not to release them on an annual basis. My point being that at some point they have to come up short on new features because, well, they’re just out of ideas. As time goes on, and as the series reaches its 12th (?) year of existence, I feel that it may be getting even harder for them to keep the games fresh.

Every few years, EA does manage to put out a version of their NHL game that blows people away and completely revolutionizes the series. By the same token, however, they have also released a number of generally underwhelming installments, offering very few noticeable differences and only a handful bells and whistles that we don’t really need. It used to be about making the best game possible and improving graphics and functionality steadily every year. Now it seems like EA may have reached a plateau where they can’t improve it much more, so they are throwing in silly new features just so gamers feel like they are getting a “different” experience.

At this point you can probably guess where this review is headed. For me, NHL 2003 was one of those installments that I could really have lived without. Sure it has updated team rosters, and the same generally solid gameplay that EA has already established, but other than that, there’s not much new or improved about it.

The most highly touted new feature of this year’s game is the advanced control over deking, which honestly is not a big deal. You hold down the deke button and your player will quickly pull the puck to his backhand or perform a similar maneuver, but it’s unpredictable and hard to control. I prefer to just stick handle and deke the normal way.

EA also introduced a new “Game Breaker” mode, which allows you to press a button and shift the action into slow motion (not unlike Max Payne’s bullet time) if your team has built up enough momentum. This is supposed to add to the edge of your seat excitement during close games, but the problem is that it actually seems to make it harder to score, so there’s no real advantage to using it. Things like the Game Breaker mode and the Breakaway camera (which was introduced in 2002 I believe) are perfect examples of unnecessary frills that EA has thrown in, regardless of their playability. At least you can turn them off these features.

The graphics and animations in 2003 are updated, but not a huge improvement from last year. Some of the new post-goal celebrations are pretty neat, and some of the replay dissolves and other TV broadcast simulations made me take note of how EA is inching closer and closer to achieving an exact reproduction of a hockey game on TV. The intro animations, however, are pretty cheesy, such as when you see a close-up of a player’s face and then he visualizes himself in his mind scoring a goal or delivering a big hit against the opposing team.

Play by play commentary is again provided by the inimitable Don Taylor and Jim Hughson, and like last year’s commentary it is once again off-the-wall and wacky although it seems a little more forced this time around. The size of their “vocabulary” is growing however, and it’s impressive how much variety to their chatter EA was able to include.

The new “EA Traxx” are just lame. While you navigate around menus, and often during auto replays or stoppages in play you are treated to some fist-pumping rock songs, complete with a caption telling you the name of the song, artist and album. I don’t mind some of the bands (ie. Jimmy Eat World, gob) but seeing a goal replayed in slow motion to the tune of Default or Papa Roach just makes me wince. This isn’t basketball or lacrosse, hockey doesn’t need to be given “attitude” in such a superficial way. Once again, you can import your own MP3s into the game though, so I probably have no right to complain about the musical selections.

EA continues to provide the player with a sickening amount of control over game settings. The new menu layout is pretty slick and easy to navigate, but I’m starting to think that there’s almost too much control here. I don’t even know where to start when it comes to tweaking the physics and AI anymore. It might be nice to have a few default collections of settings, depending on the type of gameplay you prefer, because as it is I will probably never fiddle with most of these options. There is one exception however: the default speed of this year’s game seems very slow-paced and makes the controls frustratingly stiff. You may find it necessary to bump up the speed a few notches to make the game flow a little better. The thing is, when you increase the game speed significantly, it seems like the computer A.I. can’t keep up, as pucks start flying in the net left and right. Then again, maybe I’m just good.

I could always test out that theory by playing against some human opponents, but I haven’t gotten around to it yet. The on-line play is one of the big selling points for the PC version of this game and as long as it’s as smooth as 2001 or 2002 it will be sufficient. The game’s main menu is really designed to encourage people to sign up and play on-line through the EA Sports Online service. Personally I just can’t be bothered to try it out at the moment, but it’s nice to know that the option is there.

I was a little dismayed to find that EA cut out the Face Import tools this year, which is a bummer. Then again, it seems like I’m the only nerd who actually went through the effort of using this feature, so maybe they’re hoping no one will notice. Well I noticed damnit! I hope that this means they’re in the process of fine-tuning it for next year’s release. I hope.

One of the weakest parts of the game (and it has been for as long as I can remember) is the fighting. This is one area that EA really needs to inject some life into. Everyone loves a good hockey fight, but after 12 years of NHL games, they still can’t offer anything better than a button tapping contest?! Come on now… even the original Blades of Steel had a little more strategy to the fights. How come you can’t block, or jersey the guy, or pull him down on the ice? I guess the NHL might get all upset if they were to make the fights more violent or put more emphasis on them in the game, but let’s face it, that’s what the fans want!

Overall, the game runs pretty smoothly, at least on a higher end PC with a decent video card. However, I did find it bailing out on me and crashing back to Windows every now and then while I was taking my time going through the various menus. I haven’t heard of anyone else having these problems though, so I guess it could just be my setup.

NHL 2003 is available for just about every video game platform going right now, and it’s your choice whether or not it’s worth buying. It is the first EA hockey game to be released for the X-Box and Gamecube, and that might be a selling point if you own one of those systems. As far as the PC version goes, however, you’d be better off paying bargain bin prices for the 2001 or 2002 version and finding a fan-made roster update somewhere on the web. Don’t get me wrong, NHL 2003 is still a great hockey game, but in terms of offering something new and interesting, it’s a disappointment. Unless you’re a die hard, I’d recommend skipping NHL 2003, and instead keep your fingers crossed regarding what EA might have up their sleeve for next year. — Sean

matt pond PA - The Nature Of Maps
(Polyvinyl)

Let’s get one misconception out of the way right off the bat: matt pond PA is not a solo project. It is simply a band started by a guy named Matt Pond, and although he writes and sings the lyrics and also plays guitar, each of the other members are equally responsible for the band’s output. On their latest recording, the band includes five other musicians in addition to Pond: two cellists, a second guitarist, a bassist, and a drummer who also plays vibraphone and keyboards. Then there’s some guest musicians on top of that (including Margaret White of Sparklehorse on violins).

The Nature Of Maps, matt pond PA’s fourth full length recording, takes us on a geographical journey across musical hills and valleys, rivers and oceans. They are clearly an indie rock band who have matured beyond the noise and angst of punk rock, and instead have focused their attention on creating atmosphere and emotion in their songs. This is not to say that they don’t have any energy or intensity in their playing, but the band has a beautiful orchestral sound that results from the refined instrumentation and heartfelt melodies.

Influences such as The Cure and later Beatles can be heard here, and maybe even a little bit of Pavement somewhere in the mix too. From the opening track, Fairlee, with its driving rhythm and melancholy guitar strains, to the uplifting folk balladry of Athabasca, The Nature Of Maps presents numerous lush sounds melded together into a musical experience that radiates honesty and warmth. Perhaps my favourite song is the plaintive Summer Is Coming, which builds from faint vibraphone and cello echoes into a crescendo of strings and soaring vocals.

This is an ambitious album and it rarely falters in its musicianship, although it does require a patient ear to appreciate it completely. There is not much else being done quite like this in the indie rock world right now. It’s not angry, it’s not raw, it’s not edgy … rather it is soothing and refreshing, and with each listen it becomes more and more enjoyable. — Sean

Punch-Drunk Love
Written and Directed by: P.T. Anderson
Starring: Adam Sandler, Emily Watson, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Luis Guzmán

A good way to start off this review is probably to say right up front that Punch-Drunk Love is NOT your typical Adam Sandler movie. This isn’t another cheesy Saturday Night Live collaboration that tells a predictable fish-out-of-water story (although it does have a few SNL cast connections aside from Sandler, oddly enough). I’m sure there are plenty of Happy Gilmore and Billy Madison fans who walked out on this one, simply because this movie is a little more artful, mysterious and slow-moving than Adam Sandler’s usual fare. And while I’m as much a fan of some of Adam Sandler’s silly comedies as anyone else, I can easily say Punch-Drunk Love is his most impressive accomplishment to date.

It is also important to note that Punch-Drunk Love was written and directed by Paul Thomas Anderson, the man behind such films as Boogie Nights and Magnolia. Whether he’s getting indirectly slagged for his pretentiousness by Kevin Smith, or receiving heaps of praise from critics for his unique vision, P.T. Anderson certainly knows how to get people talking. Punch-Drunk Love follows through with Anderson’s signature style once again, and while it is slightly more upbeat and straightforward than his past movies, it still has dark elements to the story, and it showcases Anderson’s methodical, pre-meditated camera work to perfection.

Barry Egan (Adam Sandler) is a shy, paranoid guy who works as a wholesaler of strange novelty items in a warehouse. He has 7 sisters, all of whom hassle him constantly about his life, in particular, about getting a girlfriend. He’s extremely insecure, depressed, and he has no one to talk to, which leads him to call a phone sex line simply for conversation. Unfortunately for him, the girl that he talks to formulates a scheme to blackmail him, and when he refuses to pay up, she sends some goons out to rough him up.

Adam Sandler is perfect as an eccentric, nervous guy who sometimes has violent outbursts. Many of his past roles had this same quality to them, but in Punch-Drunk Love his performance is less goofy, toned down, and as a result, much more intense. Emily Watson plays Lena Leonard, a friend of one of his sisters, who falls in love with him and helps him to make sense of his life. She is a realistic yet sympathetic woman who gives Barry the benefit of the doubt. The cast also features Philip Seymour Hoffman, a longtime P.T. Anderson mainstay, who only comes into view towards the end of the movie. He plays the owner of the phone sex service, and not surprisingly, he nails yet another role as a creep of low moral fibre. Although he is underused in the movie, he makes the film’s climax unforgettable.

I have to admit, in general, Punch-Drunk Love is not as strange as I thought it would be. After some of the initial reports I had read, I was ready for some sort of crazy drug-induced journey along the lines of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. I had heard that someone experienced a seizure during a screening of the movie due to the on-screen chaos. I had also heard someone refer to the movie as being undeniably filmed by someone who was on cocaine. Perhaps, but other than the little psychedelic colour bursts that separate some of the scenes, the movie is no more bizarre than any of Anderson’s other movies. There are weird coincidences and troubled characters, but that’s as experimental as it gets.

When I look back on it, Punch-Drunk Love had a surprisingly simple plot line. It unravels itself slowly and keeps you guessing all the way through, but by the end it is all laid out in the open. There weren’t any big twists, which is a change of pace after the complexity of Magnolia and all its interwoven storylines. The movie was also very short, just under 90 minutes in fact. At the same time, the movie manages to be refreshingly original and unpredictable. In a way, I think Anderson is silencing his critics by proving that he doesn’t need an overly complicated or lengthy film in order to create a masterpiece.

Punch-Drunk Love is a light-hearted romantic comedy that demonstrates P.T. Anderson’s versatility as a director, and also reveals that there is more to Adam Sandler than meets the eye. It might be a stretch to say Adam Sandler deserves an Oscar for his performance, but his credibility has been definitely been increased a hundred times as a result. Don’t go to this movie expecting to laugh your ass off, just be prepared to see something unique and moving. You won’t be disappointed. — Sean

Brother Danielson and The Nine Fruit Tree
Thursday, October 24, 2002 @ The Underground, Hamilton

Daniel Smith, aka Brother Danielson, frontman for the eccentric Christian avante-garde folk troupe known as The Danielson Famile (yes it’s spelled with an “e”), made a couple rare appearances in southern Ontario this October as he happened to be in the area for a friend’s wedding (a member of the band Royal City, incidentally). Although the rest of the “family” was not playing with him, his friend Sufjan Stevens lent a hand and the resulting on-stage antics made for one of the most unique performances I have ever seen.

Let me start by saying that I am not a particularly big fan of Christian music. Not that I think that the religious beliefs of musicians should prevent me from liking their songs… I just don’t think a musician’s religious beliefs should really have anything to do with the music at all, Which is why I find it distracting and a little exclusionary when Christian bands make a big show of it. Positive lyrics are great, but Christian bands are notorious for being preachy and borderline brainwashing audience members.

The Danielson Famile are an exception however. While they are a Christian band who let their beliefs enter into their lyrics and their music, there is something about them that is so unique, so refreshing, and so honest that makes it almost impossible to dislike them. Of course, Danielson’s screechy falsetto vocals might succeed in turning off a lot of people, but it is these vocals that form the very basis of the Danielson Famile’s charm and innocence. I suppose they are a bit of an acquired taste, but hearing the vocals live, coming straight from an excitable Danielson only makes it even more endearing. His voice sounds identical in person as it does on recordings, and it catches you off guard, even when you are already familiar with their music.

But I have yet to mention the coolest part of his solo performances. The Danielson Famile are known for wearing homemade doctor and nurse outfits while on-stage, but Danielson himself goes above and beyond a simple costume. He has created a giant tree with fruits hanging from it that acts as both a set piece and a costume. With a hole for his head and two for his arms, he is able to step inside the tree, and then play guitar and sing from within, which is quite a sight to behold. He also has bells strapped to one leg, which allow him to stomp his foot and keep a beat, even if this extra movement does find the tree in danger of collapsing after almost every song.

Sufjan Stevens provided backing vocals, in addition to playing banjo and occasionally a toy piano (which was mostly too quiet to hear, unfortunately). Both he and Danielson had song books in front of them which was odd to see. Not many bands write out sheet music for their own songs and then follow along with them during concerts. It made it feel as though they were some sort of church choir on stage, and when Danielson encouraged all of us to sing along and participate in the songs this became even more a reality. There was no question that they were having a lot of fun on stage, and the audience seemed mostly very receptive. There were a few hecklers in the crowd, but to the uninitiated I’m sure that this show must have seemed very bizarre indeed.

It would have been great to see the whole “family” play together, but I was quite amazed at how full and vibrant the songs sounded with only two musicians on stage. I think there is a lot to be said for the energy and passion that Danielson brings to his music.

The set was all too short since Brother Danielson was not actually the night’s headliner, but they were still able to get through at least 6 or 7 Danielson Famile favourites, including “Cutest Lil Dragon” and a number of selections from Fetch The Compass Kids. All I have to say is that if going to church was this fun, I might even reconsider my religious beliefs… so long as it would give me a chance to hear more live music from these guys. Is Danielson a musical angel sent from above, or is he just a guy with a guitar and a high pitched voice? I was willing to bet on the latter, but after seeing them play I just might be more flexible on the issue. — Sean

Bowling For Columbine
Written and Directed by: Michael Moore

Michael Moore is finally reaching a point in his career where people will no longer be confusing him with actor Roger Moore, and his latest film, Bowling For Columbine, is only going to get him even more recognition. Not that his previous documentaries, Roger & Me and The Big One, didn’t cause a lot of buzz. Not that his TV shows TV Nation and The Awful Truth didn’t have sizable cult followings. Not that his books Downsize This! Random Threats from an Unarmed American and Stupid White Men weren’t bestsellers. There was also a certain movie that he wrote and directed called Canadian Bacon, but that may or may not be best kept under wraps.

Anyways, the point is that just about everyone should know who Michael Moore is, and love him or hate him, you’ve got to admit that he’s one of the best shit disturbers around. Give him a video camera and a cause and he will courageously run out and get in people’s faces, asking the questions that no one else has the guts to ask. Many people question his credibility and his filmmaking tactics but maybe these same people are just scared of the ideas that he is presenting. Personally I try to look past all these things and simply ask myself if the movies raise relevant questions and whether or not they are entertaining. The answer to both of these questions as far as Bowling For Columbine is concerned, is a resounding yes.

Bowling For Columbine documents Moore’s quest to deduce exactly why it is that the U.S. has such an extreme amount firearm-related fatalities every year. It’s a topic that’s as appropriate as ever, and he combines stock footage, TV news footage, and anything else he can dig up, along with narration and video and film footage of interviews and set pieces he created himself in order to point out both the absurdity and the horror brought about by a seemingly gun crazed nation. Along the way, he signs up for an account with a bank that gives out guns as free gifts, interviews “shock rocker” Marilyn Mansion, pitches an idea for a TV show called “Corporate Cops”, and even takes two Columbine survivors to K-Mart to try and get a refund for the bullets that are still lodged inside their bodies. The movie’s title originates from the fact that Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold supposedly went bowling on the morning before their killing spree, which prompts Moore to ask (with tongue planted firmly in cheek), “Why wasn’t anyone blaming bowling for corrupting these youths”? He also interviews Matt Stone, one of the creators of South Park, who oddly enough is originally from Littleton.

Bowling For Columbine is often hilarious. Moore’s sarcasm, bluntness and quick-wittedness during interviews are classic, and his choice of songs for the soundtrack of this movie was also pretty amusing. At points, Bowling For Columbine is reminiscent of American Movie, a documentary about a couple of rednecks following their dream of making a film, with regards to the eccentric people that are interviewed, and some of their unintentionally ironic quips. A seemingly South Park-inspired cartoon depicting a brief history of the U.S. is also one of the comical highlights of the movie.

The movie, however, is not all about poking fun and getting laughs. There are a lot of horrible tragedies that the movie explores, and some pretty disturbing facts. The eerie combination of Columbine security camera footage and 911 phone call recordings in particular is rather unsettling to watch.

As with any documentary, you have to realize that what you are seeing on the screen is not the ultimate truth. The director is in full control of the message that comes across, and depending on his or her agenda, the truth is usually going to get stretched or distorted in some way. It’s certainly true that the selective editing of this movie can be misleading at times, and much of the information we are presented with is questionable or incomplete. For instance, I think it is safe to say that the majority of Canadians actually do lock their doors. (But perhaps not in the middle of the day, which is when Michael Moore conducted his supposed “investigation” into this trend.) Also, in discussing the murder rates in Canada, he glossed over cities like Toronto, which had about 30 homicide cases involving firearms last year. Still a drop in the bucket compared to the U.S., but a little more serious than Windsor or Sarnia. The thing is, I don’t think that Bowling For Columbine claims to have any real answers in the first place. Moore emphasizes and summarizes as he chases down a few theories here and there, but in the end, I think he ends up being just as puzzled about the whole thing as we are.

The movie’s inevitable climax comes when Moore confronts N.R.A. president Charlton Heston, and in some ways it is a disappointment that Heston’s responses are (predictably) dim-witted and ignorant. Moore easily succeeds in making him look like a jackass, but was that really his goal here? Heston isn’t the villain in this movie in the same sense that Roger Smith of G.M. was the bad guy in Roger & Me. I think Moore himself wanted a logical explanation from an opposing point of view, and Heston does not present us with any answers at all. The thing that really struck me about the interview is that there can be no reasoning with gun enthusiasts. They just babble on about having “the right to bear arms” until they’re blue in the face, but they never stop to ask why they want or need to bear arms in the first place. If there is a bottom line to the movie, it would seem to be that there is no valid excuse for guns (even hunting is questionable in my book) and their widespread use is simply due to fear: an anonymous, inexplicable fear that runs rampant throughout America, fuelled by the media and masking the real important issues that the nation should be concerned with.

I have a feeling that Canadians may enjoy watching this movie just because it is a chance for us to feel smug and proud of our lifestyle. We must realize, however, that American problems have a way of eventually becoming our own problems as well. (After seeing this movie, for example, a lot of Americans might be persuaded to simply pick up and move north of the border!)

Ultimately, I think Bowling For Columbine may not affect as much change as some might hope. For the most part, Moore will be preaching to the converted, that is, people who are fans of his work or people who are against guns, and the fact that the movie does not have a single clear cut stance makes it ineffective as a form of persuasion. The gun nuts are not likely to be swayed by a film like this, even if they do happen to watch it. On the other hand, Moore’s humble yet humourous approach should turn a few heads, and I certainly hope that it does reach out to some of the opposition. I just wish that the movie had a wider release so that it could at least have a chance to open more eyes.

If my review means anything at all, I urge you to seek out the nearest movie theatre and see Bowling For Columbine today! If not today, then tomorrow! It’s absolutely worth the drive to Oakville (or New York, as the case may be). Michael Moore may not have all the answers, but he poses some evocative questions, and he presents it all in a way that is fun to watch. Rumour also has it that Michael Moore will be putting the profits from this movie towards his next project, a documentary on 9/11. And that, my friends, would be the icing on the cake. — Sean